Friday, June 30, 2006

MAN APPEALS FOR LIFE



“Give me my life back.” With these words local resident John Riley appealed to Moenui today in a statement that brought an outpouring of sympathy from the public. Riley who has no recollection of when and where his life went missing says that his wife’s pleas for him to “get a life” have finally prompted him to seek help from the community.
”Every time I hear that someone is leading the life of Riley I go through a period of anxiety and grieving. To think that someone else is out there, living my life and apparently having such a good time is just so heart-breaking. To reflect that it could be me that’s living the high life. I could really go for a slap up meal a fast car and a fast woman right now.”
Riley quickly withdrew the comment about the fast woman, saying that his wife was a wonderful person. He then rushed home to watch Oprah.

John Riley in happier times

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