Friday, July 14, 2006

HOSPITAL COLOUR CODE CAUSES CLOSURE

Moenui Hospital confirmed today that it refused new admissions and cancelled all elective surgery appointments for three months because of a mistake by a colour blind administrator.
Rather than implementing a "Code Yellow" or situation normal in April "Bluey' Wilson told staff they were on a "Code Red" and staff spent the next three months barring the doors and sending out cancellation letters, believing that the hospital was full.
Hospital CEO Fairlie Crook today apologised to the town saying that no-one realised anything was wrong until one of the cleaners alerted management.
"The last patient had been sent home that morning and senior medical staff and management had broken out the champaigne to celebrate a town in perfect health. There we were joking that our Junior Doctor could take a lunch-break when Maude Akaroa looked up from her mopping and told us in a-none-too subtle fashion that her mother's hip was as painful as ever and half the town had been turned away by hospital security with the advice to wrap up, take two disprin and get medical insurance."
Mr Crook said that an immediate investigation was begun but the source of the problem was only uncovered when "Bluey" Wilson arrived at work saying he thought his wife had red jaundice.
Meanwhile local commentator Frank Lush, sipping on a hot toddy in the lounge bar of the Masonic Hotel said that modern medicine is a tricky business. "How many Doctors does it take to change a light bulb?" asked Lush. "Only one, but then you need six administrators to manage the process."

The colour coding system used erroneously by Bluey Wilson

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