Wednesday, November 22, 2006


Moenui pensioners John and Jane Doe revealed tonight that a sex video based on Don Brash's emails may never reach the screen. "It's a tragedy," Mrs Doe told reporters. "The nation may never see this real cracker skin-flick."
Speaking at an especially arranged press conference at the Sunset Pensioner Village the septuagenarian couple who star in the video said that the injunction expressly banning them from publishing left them disappointed and out of pocket.
"We are in the same position as Nicky Hagar," said a clearly upset Jane Doe. "Except we left out the boring political stuff and just featured the sexy bits."
"We've spent months training for the exhausting roles and then filming and now we are left with a whole heap of tape and unpaid physio and drug bills," John Doe told the Kiwi Herald. "I may even have to return the new dentures I got for the role. That's if I can find them and aah frankly I can't remember whether I wore them in the final scene involving the Exclusive Brethren or not."

Mrs Doe said that her husband had been perfect in the role of Dr Brash; a man with an extraordinary inability to remember anything that happened more than two minutes previously but an absolute God in the bedroom.
She could not reveal any details of the video but did not discount suggestions that former National Party President Collinge has a cameo role nor that Kim Jung Il has added an advance copy of the movie to his vaste collection.

No comments: