BRASH, BUSH, THE BANKER AND DAN

More stories from our retrospective. These from September and October 2006:

BRASH DECLARES NATIONAL GOVERNMENT IN EXILE

Sept 5 2006

Don Brash announced the formation of a "National Government in exile" today after Helen Clark dismissed his calls for a fresh election as "grandstanding." Speaking from the main stand at Athletic Park Dr Brash said that his Party could no longer stand by "while Ms Clark and her band of thieves refuse to hand back the stolen election."
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BOY BANKER REPORTS RECORD PROFITS

Sept 12 2206
Seven year old Eric Lewis announced today that his First Playground Bank has achieved record profits in the last six months. The boy who began by investing lunch-money on behalf of classmates and moved on to establish the country's first 'Cash for Good Behaviour' scheme, insuring schools against student misdemeanours during ERO visits, made his CEO report while receiving Moenui school's prize for financial literacy.
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MENOPAUSE, IMPOTENCE, ART

20 Sept 2006 (From Our Arts Reporter)
Moenui opera-buff John 'Giovanni' Brown premiered his new one man show 'Impotence-the opera' in the Moenui town-hall last night. The opera, inspired by the highly successful musical 'Menopause-the musical' is described as 'the story of everyman.' Read on

BUSH'S FETISH FORCED COLIN POWELL OUT

Former Secretary of State Colin Powell has revealed that he left George Bush's cabinet because "if the texan nut-bar had patted my head one more time I was going to kill him." ....read on

CARTER'S NEW HAIR-STYLE ROCKS RUGBY WORLD

8 October 2006
Rugby World Cup organisers were today locked in crisis talks after interest in next years event plummeted following Daniel Carter's hair-staightening, according to the Sunday Star-Times.
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